Sport in New Zealand

Men’s National Rugby Team: The All Blacks

The All Blacks are NZ’s most famous sporting export. For over 100 years, the All Blacks have been terrorizing other rugby playing nations with their distinct brand of ferocious and flowing rugby. They perform the intimidating Maori haka before every game and have some of the baddest ass black jerseys the sporting world has ever known. The team started wearing all black jerseys while on their first Northern Hemisphere tour in 1905 and  have worn the menacing kit ever since. Since rugby is New Zealand’s national sport and the team has a long tradition of success, the All Blacks have become as synonymous with New Zealand as Lord of the Rings.

Note: The national wheelchair rugby team is called the Wheel Blacks.

Men’s National Soccer (Football) Team: The All Whites

Relative soccer minnows, New Zealand qualified for the 2010 World Cup after a 28 year absence and have been the most impressive Oceanic team so far, earning two draws in their first two matches. The grand stage of a World Cup, along with some shocking success, has been huge exposure for the All Whites, who are looking to advance to the Round of 16 for the first time. Their All White nickname actually came about the last time they were in a World Cup, back in 1982. They wore an all white kit for their qualifying match against Taiwan and the obvious play on the All Blacks nickname was born. The nickname becomes hilarious when you consider the ethnic make-up of the All Blacks and All Whites.

Note: The All Whites don’t do the haka before games, mostly because it’s not as intimidating when a bunch of skinny, white soccer players do it.

Men’s National Basketball Team: The Tall Blacks

In New Zealand, everybody wants to be media and marketing darlings like the All Blacks, so the national basketball team decided to get clever and put their own spin on the All Blacks moniker: The Tall Blacks. While not known for their basketball, New Zealand did finish 4th at the 2002 FIBA World Championships (where the Tall Blacks beat Russia, Puerto Rico and China) and they recently defeated Australia in Oceanic qualifying for the 2010 World Championships in Turkey.

Note: The only New Zealander in the NBA is “The Kiwi Highlight Machine” Sean Marks.

National Badminton Team: The Black Cocks

By this point you have probably begun to understand the New Zealand sporting nomenclature. They love the All Blacks and any sort of variation on their famous nickname. So when New Zealand Badminton was struggling for a piece of the sporting limelight they decided to get provocative. Black Racquets? Too obvious. Black Birdies? Too cute. Black Cocks? Perfect.

Seriously, they officially referred to their national badminton team as the Black Cocks! How amazing is that? The International Badminton Federation didn’t appreciate the name, especially when the condom sponsorships began rolling in, and now the team is only “unofficially” known as the Black Cocks. But it definitely lead to some excellent headlines while it lasted.